The Brave Choice to Light the Flames of Kindness


There are many things that I do not know or understand. I do not claim to comprehend all the issues and complexities of life, but I am terribly worried for and about our human race. It appears that our capacity and thrill to hurt, wound and destroy each other is growing by the minute! I don’t know much, but I do know that we can choose to use our freewill to push back against hate and unkindness. It’s not easy, but in the face of all the anger, pessimism, bitterness, evil, meanness and darkness we are surrounded by every day, WE CAN MAKE THE BRAVE CHOICE TO LIGHT THE FLAMES OF KINDNESS!

I am not naive; I know that situations in life are not always clear cut. I am not so simplistic as to expect that every situation is cut and dry or easy to deal with or to find solutions to. There are some situations in my own life which I am still trying to figure out how to handle and I have to make a deliberate effort and choice to either react positively or simply stay away until I can deal with them in a better, more positive fashion.  However, I do know that we make our choices, and they come with consequences. I do know that my attitude towards people and how I treat them matters! I dare to be idealistic and brave enough to believe that we can love better instead of hating, we can be kind instead of unkind, if we make the brave choice to do so! We are humans! Our solution to our personal fears, insecurities and anger DO NOT have to result in the destruction of another human being.

Let’s stop for a minute and take a really good look around us.  What has hate, stigma, prejudice, finger-pointing, unkindness, down-putting, slandering, division and stereotyping done for humanity? Because we do not agree with someone, their character, their behavior, their race, their creed, their lifestyle, the way they talk and walk, should that justify that we hate them and treat them like dirt? I DON’T BELIEVE SO! Many times we ask to be understood and accepted, yet we do not do the same for others.  In my hurt, anger and confusion, I have found it to be wiser to take a deep breath, hold my tongue, which comes with a lot of practice, and walk away from a person or a situation I do not understand or know how to handle. My pain, anger and insecurities are not a license to inflict wounds on other people!

I have my own personal thoughts, beliefs and opinions about many things, but should that compel me to despise others who have a difference in opinion? My choice should not be to subscribe and enlist other people to hate and despise other people just because we differ. Can we be brave enough to stop hating and instead be brave and courageous enough to give love and show kindness to our fellow human beings? It’s not easy, but it’s not impossible! Hate, meanness and unkindness are cheap commodities, found everywhere, but kindness and love are hard to come by, they are not cheap and common.

I understand that sometimes we have to have uncomfortable conversations, but how we have the conversation matters! Is it from a heart and mindset of searching for wisdom and knowledge on how to handle a person or situation in a kinder, gentler more loving and understanding manner, and towards creating peace? Or are we just itching to whisper evil and malign another to the next available ear, and sow a destructive opinion and thought in the next easily influenced heart and mind? Are we thriving on destroying, slandering and degrading others, planning their demise, obsessed with pulling them down, or are we having the conversation in order to work towards unity, collaboration and peace? Some of us will insist that being nasty is our right, and that leads me wonder.

  • How has hate and wrecking another soul assisted us?
  • How has such behavior, such mindsets served humanity or set us free?
  • Do we derive real joy and real peace from such behavior?
  • Does it chase our personal demons away and set us free from them?
  • Does it bring us healing from our depression and insecurities?
  • Does it liberate and relieve us from our deepest fears, misplaced and misdirected anger?
  • Does it take away the darkness that torments us from within?

 The answer is plain and simple, NO, to all of the above!

Do not let kindness and truth leave you; Bind them around your neck, Write them on the tablet of your heart. Proverbs 3:3 (NASB)

More than ever, our human race needs all the love and kindness we can muster.

Will you be brave enough to light the flames of kindness?



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